attack of the evil short people
by nuna
Summary: discontinued no one reviewed it for about a year now so i im not writing it anymore. ikeeping it up so u ppl can still read it and because it actually got reviewed in the first place. srry to all u ppl who liked it. i may eventually write more.
1. a new arival

Hello and welcome to my very first ever fan fic now I don't mind flaming unless you it says something like this story sucks. That sort of flame does not help me in how I can improve my skills.  
  
Disclaimer: I do not own any of these characters except for Cli.  
  
"Class" ms Bitters announced we have a new doomed student, this is Cli. Now Cli do you have any last words before you plunge into your doom. Cli looked out at the class. "Um… no" she said. "Then you may take your seat" replied ms bitters. Cli once again looked out at the class. There wasn't a single empty desk. "um ms Bitters" she said in a confused tone of voice, there are no empty desks. Ms Bitters who had been floating eerily beside her disappeared and reappeared next a kid in the back. The kid turned pale and gave a frightened squeak. Then dark enveloped the room and somewhere outside thunder clapped. Only a few seconds later the lights were back on and ms Bitters was in front of her desk. "There" said ms Bitters, that kid was doomed anyway, now go sit down. Cli scurried over to her desk and sat down before her strange new teacher could decide to make something happen to her. Buwahahahaha. It was a green kid in front, do you see the pitiful dirt bag run like a scared…thing? You will all bow down to me zim. Zim started to laugh insanely. Then a kid with a big head and strange hair dressed in a black  
  
Trench coat stood up on his desk and pointed at zim and started to yell. See he is an alien. Ms Bitters floated up from her desk and to the front of the class; whose pupils were all yelling and bickering. She just floated their for a while but then she started to talk in her eerie voice that seemed to dig into every ones mind and shut them up. "be quiet" she said, before I doom you all to doominess.  
  
Chapter 2 coming soon sorry for any delays :) 


	2. a cafeteria full of doomyness

Disclaimer: once again I do not own any characters except for cli.  
  
  
  
Chapter two: A cafeteria full of doominess  
  
Cli was sitting at her desk thoroughly bored. So bored in fact that she had taken to watching a fly buzz happily around another kids head. The fly soon tired of this sport and flew up towards a sparking light. It was probably drawn toward it in some kind of trance. When the fly got too close a spark hit it and it exploded in a puff of smoke. It then hurled to the ground and landed in a well overdone heap.  
  
Only seconds after the fly hit the ground the bell rang. It was time for lunch. O.k. class you are now officially doomed to eat lunch. You are all doooomed. Doom doom doom doom… Most of the class went racing out of the classroom with the exception of Cli who was quite content with walking and zim. Zim approached her and started to speak. Greetings pitiful human scum thingy I was chosen to be your walk around buddy (zim cringed while saying buddy) and show you around the skool. I am required to do… things with you until you are… settled.  
  
Cli looked at zim strangely. Zim continued to speak. Uh… I must first set one thing straight. STAY AWAY FROM DIB. I have no further advice to give you besides warning you not to eat the cafeteria food, today were having anchovies and sweet pickle relish in a bun. Cli was disgusted.  
  
When Cli entered the cafeteria there was a major food fight in progress or a major food fling I might say, everyone was throwing food at the kid in the black trench coat. When cli tried to walk to an empty seat she was almost hit by a moldy penutbutter and pig fat sandwich that was covered in sweat and sour sauce. Instead it flew past her and lodged itself in the mouth of another kids throat. The kid started to gag and threw-up the sandwich and a considerate amount of saliva and blood before collapsing on the ground and rolling around in it obviously he still had some lodged in his throat. No one seemed to notice this.  
  
Cli searched the room for an open seat that wasn't in the middle of the food fling (now kids were throwing objects at the kid in the trench coat that weren't edible.) the only empty seat was next to zim. Zim hadn't noticed when she sat down next to him because he was too busy watching the kid in the trench coat get pummeled. "Ha take that dib" he shouted as the kid in the trench coat or dib was hit in the head with an extremely large item. Dib fixed zim with a glare and zim glared back. This didn't continue for long because only a moment later dib was hit with a chair in the stomach area. Lets see how your weak human organs can take that my squidelyspooch is much stronger than your… your… filthy humany things. (Zim was at a loss for words.)  
  
The chaos in the lunch room went on well after the bells rung and into the afternoon. When the kids finally returned to class it was time for them to go home. Dib went home right after kids stopped throwing things at him he was badly injured and wasn't at skool the next few days.  
  
More soon  
  
nuna 


	3. and now for the point of this story

Disclaimer: I'm getting tired of doing this. I do not own these characters except for cli. There I said it you happy yet?  
  
  
  
Chapter 3: And now for the point of this story.  
  
  
  
It had been a week since the new kid arrived. Zim hadn't paid much attention to her she was another filthy human, yet her behavior was… different. She was too quiet. While all the other mud pigs ran around the room like… like things she would sit and pay attention. Hanging on to every word the teacher said like she was an alien. "An alien" Zim screamed out. The rest of the class stared at Zim. Dib looked at him quizzically. "That's my line Zim" dib said. You can't just go around stealing peoples lines. "Do not fight me earth monkey" Zim replied. "You can't control me zim" dib yelled, then he lunged at zim knocking him to the ground. Zim got back up and almost fell over again (he couldn't use his spider legs to steady himself.)  
  
Eventually this developed into a ravenous fight which was stopped after a short amount of time by a hiss from Ms. Bitters. I may allow squabbling but if you start to fight everyone is doomed. Zim and Dib returned to there seats. Ms Bitters continued with a lecture she had been giving. Once again zim had noticed that Cli was sitting in the back of the room listening to every word and taking notes, as was he. "Noooooooo" zim screamed. The class once again was staring at him. He noticed this and came up with a nice fake excuse. I broke a claw. Dib jumped out of his seat. "Humans don't have claws" he yelled.  
  
"Shut up Dib" yelled a kid in the back, and he did. The real reason why Zim had cried out was because he suspected something. Something horrible. He suspected that Cli was an alien spy come to earth to foil his plans of domination, but she would nether succeed oh no he'd catch her before she did Buwahahahaha Buwahahahaha buwahahahahahahaha.  
  
  
  
More soon I'm having computer trouble sorry. ( make sure you wait for the next chapter! Its called: a tale of two note passers.  
  
  
  
Yours truly  
  
nuna 


	4. a tale of two note passers

Disclaimer: me myself and I do not own invader zim, dim oh I mean dib gaz or any other character that won't appear in this fanfic, however I do own Cli. Heh heh heh.  
  
  
  
  
  
Chapter 4: a tale of two note passers.  
  
  
  
Cli was once again bored out of her wits. She was just about to fall asleep when something caught her eye. Some white object zooming in then right out of eye range. This place is strange she thought. Just then the same thing happened only it was going in the other direction. "What" she said aloud. Fortunately no one heard her or did they.  
  
Cli decided to give them a little test. She jumped up on her desk and stamped down with her foot. Look everybody she said pointing out the window, it's a U.F.O. Dib jumped up "where" he asked whipping out a camera. "Dib" ms Bitters said sit down. "But there's a U.F…." Dib was cut off. "Dib I told you to sit down" said ms bitters or ill doom you into the darkness of doom. (Note: I try to use doom at least once in every chapter.)  
  
Cli noticed that she looked a little more menacing than usual. "Now for the final test" Cli sneered. All of the sudden she jumped out of her desk and screamed at the top of her lungs. Dib made a fragile attempt to jump out of his desk but tripped on one of the chair legs and fell flat on his face. "Do you see him fall buwahahahahahaha if all scum butts are that stupid than I'll conquer earth in a matter of seconds" quote of zim. Zim started laughing uncontrollably until something hit his foot. He looked down. "No" he thought it was that infernal piece of paper. Dib had kicked it back to him for the second time. Was this some type of earth scum game? He kicked it back to Dib. Dib opened it looked at it then scowled, and he started to wave it in the air. "zim you read what's inside' he yelled across the room.  
  
"DOOM" hissed ms bitters. That was enough to convince dib to stop yelling. Hoping what he said was enough to convince zim to read it; Dib scribbled something on the paper and kicked the paper across the room to zim. Zim stopped it with his foot picked it up and looked at it. "These are no human words" Zim commented. "Zim it's upside down" said a human behind him. "Oh well yes I…I knew that" said zim Dib how dare write them upside down to fool me; I am not a fool Dib. I have unveiled your scheme. Dib looked at Zim with a puzzled expression then said "zim I had no scheme you just opened it upside down". "You lie you lie" zim hissed. Dib scowled "just read it Zim".  
  
Zim turned the note around and read its contents. Zim you smell bad. Zim hurriedly scribbled a reply on the paper and kicked it back to Dib. Dib caught it and opened it. It read: ⃟Dib looked at the paper confused "Zim what does this say" he said waving the paper in the air. Is this the language your alien race writes in huh huh is it Zim? I know it is. "no it isn't" Zim snapped give it to me I'll fix it. "no Zim ill keep this' sneered dib but before he knew it the paper was I Zim's hands and ripped into tiny pieces on the floor. "hey" dib cried out. He grabbed another piece of paper and scribbled something on it, then tossed it at Zim's head. It bounced off and fell into his hand. Zim opened it and read it. Zim what's your home planets name? zim scribbled something on the paper and kicked to dib. lyke im teling yu then dib kicked it back with his reply and so this went on.  
  
Dib: your spelling is really bad zim.  
  
Zim. Kno itss advaanced.  
  
Dib: that is not advanced its wrong.  
  
Zim: itss houw yu wuud spel itt iif yu trannslated itt fromm mie lannguage.  
  
Dib: so you do have an alien language and im gonna find out what planter your from.  
  
And so this went on for a few minutes and Zim's spelling continued to get worse and this proceeded for quite some time and just when it was coming back to zim with all the information zim knew about him on it a foot stopped it. it wasn't Zim's foot or Dib's foot, the foot belonged to Cli. Nooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo, both Dib and Zim cried out and both for the same reason. There was all the information Dib knew about Zim on that paper…  
  
Thanks for reading my story this far and don't forget to review please.  
  
Sincerely  
  
Nuna. 


	5. when will i finally include the tital in...

Disclaimer: must I tell you  
  
Authors note: thanks to you I know humans are actually enjoying my pitiful story. And I am willing to continue writing an apparently doomed fic if it is to the scum-bags pleasure so while you can still bear to read such a pitiful filthy, DOOMED fan fic enjoy, oh yes an don't for get were all DOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOmed.  
  
- Doomie  
  
The real chapter 5: when will I actually include the tidal in the story?  
  
Cli hadn't read the note as a matter of fact she didn't bother to read the note. The note had gone straight to the waist-bin. She was just sitting at her desk when she heard someone talking in a voice so loud that well it was loud we'll just say that.  
  
Is that Zim she wondered? Oh well there's not much else to do in skool so I might as well listen in. Sure enough it was Zim and he was speaking very loudly. "Yes…yes pitiful earthlings Buwahahahaha I will rule them all."Zim said, every filth bag on this doomed planet is… (Zim paused trying to think of what to say) …well… uh … DOOMED. Buwahahahahahahaha. And so Zim ranted on at the top of his well squidelyspooch I guess… who knows how he is able to talk. Mostly yelling about how big Dib's head was and that if he tried to destroy earth Dib's head would get in the way.  
  
Cli got up from her desk and walked to the door just in time to see Zim walk out the entrance to skool cackling madly. Cli pondered for a moment then silently crept to the door. Zim was turning the corner so cli had to run to keep the short distance behind him that she needed to be able to follow and hide from him at the same time. He's walking awfully fast she thought while treading silently behind him.  
  
As Cli was following Zim she felt something wet on her nose than again on her arm. "Huh" Cli said aloud. When she realized her mistake she jumped behind a bush just as another rain drop wet the pavement. Zim turned around abruptly. "Who's there" he said scanning the area behind him. Zims gaze passed over her hastily chosen hiding spot before he finally saw her. "There you are" he hissed giving her an evil grin; I knew you were following me and now ive found you. Zim started to laugh insanely.  
  
Although cli was horrified she had been caught she couldn't help but notice that when a drop of rain landed on Zims arm he brushed at the spot as though it were some kind of pesky insect that kept coming back to bite him again. Then he started brushing madly at his leg than his head, and as more rain came down he started to panic and run around in circles. Was he sizzling?  
  
Seeing her chance Cli dove under a hole in the fence and scrambled as far away from zim as she could. What if he'd recognized her? Would he be out to get her now. Cli would definitely have to watch her back now.  
  
* ** * * * * * * *  
  
at skool  
  
The bell had just rung signaling the end of lunch and Dib was sitting quietly at his desk. Zim would be here soon and then he could tease him about rain and water. But zim didn't come when the bell rang signaling the beginning of class so he sat quietly thinking of a way to get zim in trouble for being late to class.  
  
"Dib" ms. Bitters hissed since you and Zim seem to be such good little DOOMED friends maybe you could tell me where Zim is. "well… uh… I not quite sure where zim… ms bitters cut him off "NOW" she shouted making half the class turn white with the exception of Dib and Torque. Keith all-out fainted. "Um" said Dib. DIB said " since you can't tell me where Zim is and because your head is so BIG" hissed ms. Bitters, you get a detention. "but…" Dib started "now SIT DOWN" said ms. Bitters Dib gave a frightened squeak and sat down.  
  
Sorry for any doomed trouble  
  
- Doomie 


End file.
